Well-said advise..from an unknown..

My sis forwarded me this blog.. her frens's fren's frens' blog. hehh.. lantaklah sapa punye.. but i kinda like what she's blabbering around.. same age as mine and probably got the same thoughts too... I agree quite a lot with her words.. for instance this one.. of she said how other people ( i think what she means is people who already married) should give more support and positive advices towards newly married and singles who's still looking for partners - as what she referred to 'threats' of how miserable can a marriage be. Come'on ol pals.. you guys should show us matured acts and words aa.. bukannya demoralise us lagi..

let's hear what's viv's got to say..

"if anyone is scared, it would be him cos the article contained quite a lot of ammos against us girls.. but it got me thinking, do these so-called tips for newly-weds (or soon-to-be engaged couples) work? or are they just a scam some ms.oldmaid or mr.bachelor-forever spread around to spook us cos they wanna make the rest of us as miserable as them?

don't mean to throw accusations, just that i'm just a lil confused with all these 'rules of thumb' of marriage. they make it sound so easy -leave that guy if he doesn't fulfil so and so.. ditch that girl if she lacked a certain criteria. what happens if he's all nice but lepas kahwin becomes incredible hulk? or if she's so the proper but after marriage becomes britney (not that anything's wrong with britney. in fact, most guys fantasize about her)? most of those stuffs we only find out after being married to that person what.

i know we shouldn't base our matrimonial needs on feelings alone cos most marriages tend to be routine (or lack in romance) after a certain number of years, so it's only logical that both partners possess some desirable qualities other than being cute & having nice butts.

nonetheless, i still think how u feel towards the other person is more important than his/her abilities to fix that darn pipe/cook/sew/mow the lawn/drive the car etc. think all their idiosyncrasies can be endured if we really sayang that person (or at least have tact & diplomacy when the other person's too demanding).

having said that, i also think marriage (like other things in life) is pretty much a gamble. not that i wanna have a clause before marriage, but it's the truth. u'll never know what will happen in the future. i for one, hate irregularities. i'm most monotonous a person can get, so i'm definitely afraid of changes (especially changes in feelings & behaviour). a gamble, like the ones at genting, is risky. don't know whether the principle of 'higher risk gives higher return' can be applied here.

how can a relationship be pleasant if there are threats everywhere? threats like what? i dunno, distance maybe.. or the fact that ur partner has a creepy mother.. or the fact that his bestfriend is so hot?that's why i'm sceptical at those tips for soon-to-be maried couples.

i think every couple is unique in their own way. some may be ok with this, others with that. like, i don't mind if my bf doesn't shower me with flowers or gifts (had all of that before & look what it did to me) but some girls may demand their guys to practise chivalry. i know that those tips are always 'in general', yet they may still cause one to feel bad if he/she doesn't do what he/she is supposed to.."

words by VIVA..check out her blog ---> http://viva.blogdrive.com/archive/cm-08_cy-2004_m-08_d-18_y-2004_o-0.html